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Monday, September 28, 2009

(writing by me) Freeform Thought Experiments


Is everything you ever thought to be real, just in your head?

There is always that possibility that what you perceive is not real; even what we think of as the "real" world could just be a complex delusion. It seems to me that, for now at least, it is a matter of faith; faith in a creator that creates you, or faith that you are just the by-product of a mindless universe that creates you, or faith that you are the creator and are one with all things. I choose to have faith in the latter of the three. I say just have faith in yourself.

If God can be thought of as that creative force that creates things, and if you think of the space in which these things are created as a mind, then what do you call these things that have been created? I think that you would call them imaginary. This is why I say that God is alone and that all creation is imaginary.

The underlying truth is always entirely present, but our perception of it is warped in some way; we are not fully conceiving it, we do not fully understand it. All that is, is infinite. If you think and therefore know that you are, then your true nature must be infinite and perfect.

When I think of why we are here, I think of potential and the sine wave. All of the truth being covered or hidden provides the potential for uncovering it all again, making it fresh, reborn, exciting, exhilarating, fantastic. Once all of the truth has been revealed, all that potential has been spent. To remain in that state would be death and stagnation. The next logical step would be to rebuild that potential again by entering into complete ignorance. Its like exhaling a breath and pushing it out for as far and as long as you can stand it and then breathing in that deeply refreshing fresh air. This is why I say that I see this as the breath of life itself and eternal awakening. The point is not to hurry to the conclusion, but rather to cherish the discovery and the awakening and the knowing of where you are going and the understanding that you truly are going to see the impossible be possible as that which is not true begins to fall away. You are the Nero, the Christ, the Mythra, etc. etc.

I consider that the potential for complete failure carries with it the potential for complete success and that we may ultimately be destined to experience both. Perhaps this story of the self is most poignantly captured in the image of the Christ figure that the Gnostics were so enamored with, which is about god who becomes a man who becomes god again. In many ways this is the same story as the Phoenix, which is totally, and utterly destroyed, then rises again from the ashes. What this points to is a way of understanding that there are not billions and billions of us or any other thing, but rather there is only one true infinite thing. It has no name or identity; it cannot be split into two and separated from itself. It is merely our temporary imperfect perception that makes this one infinite and infinitely perfect thing seem as if it is an infinite number of imperfect finite things (this is the illusion).

Our usual image of reality appears completely inverted. As Plato used the analogy of seeing the shadow forms on the wall; we are seeing a reversed mere shadow of the truth?

Many say that we are pieces of a whole. This seems illogical to me. This suggests that the whole is made up of pieces (i.e. me or you or anything else) that are capable of existing autonomously apart from the whole. It makes more sense to me to say that you are the whole; that which seems to separate you from the whole is an invention.


The real you, deep inside of you, is infinite and immortal and exists before and after your body. This immortal you has no reason for existing on its own; in other words the infinite immortal you exists without cause. Meaning or reason implies a cause or an impetus for beginning. That which is infinite has no beginning and therefore has no reason or meaning or even consciousness for that matter unless it is able to see what it is not. There is another you, the finite you. The finite you definitely has a reason for existing, and that is to define and reaffirm the infinite immortal you. The infinite immortal you is able to give its unending life and ability to the finite mortal you, and the finite mortal you is able to give reason and meaning to the infinite immortal you by receiving these things. These two sides of you walk through eternity together, forever holding hands, comforting each other, and giving and receiving unending fulfillment from one another. The meaning of life is to give and receive unending fulfillment.


I have been thinking about the Holy Trinity of the Christian religion lately and what this might mean or be about. Here are my thoughts:

The Trinity, in my view, is the Father (God, truth, creator), the Son (Christ, savior, the phallus) and the Holy Spirit (illusion, creation, the Goddess). The figure of Christ is God's alter ego that journeys from God into illusion and returns triumphant. The *we* that you imagine yourself to be, is in the position of the Goddess right now. We see ourselves as primarily being acted upon instead of doing the acting, or in other words *being screwed*. The Christ figure appears to you (and remember this is just imagery for a process of awakening that happens in you and may or may not be accompanied by an apparition at all; this is simply the hero in you rising that may take any name or form) and opens his arms and says, "I love you, I am you and you are me". As you embrace him you realize that you always were him as the illusion that you were not him fades away. Then the illusion that you are separate from God fades away as well and your journey out of illusion is complete. This is an incredible journey that happens not once, but forever; in and out, in and out, in and out; forever making Love and creation.

This is something that has been long lost and forgotten for a reason, so that we can experience the pure joy of discovery.


God, or the Godhead, is something (or Truth) and the Goddess is nothing (or Illusion).........but before the Goddess jumps up and slaps me (LOL) let me quickly explain. The Goddess is the void that something grows in and it draws the Godhead in; forever alluring and all attractive. She is what causes energy to build and grow and ultimately unite as One, all in the aim of a single purpose. *ALL* power and/or potential then comes to a single focus and intention. Perfect union occurs. Life and love come to full realization and the result is all of creation.


Enlightenment is understanding that you are coming from and going to infinite perfection and that your purpose is to give and receive unending fulfillment. It is the realization that the deepest core of your being is the infinite source of creation behind all things. You are both empowered and without ego because you see that One is all there is. Enlightenment is also the understanding that the way in which giving and receiving is accomplished cannot be reasoned since the means of accomplishing this feat is to abandon reason. Enlightenment is seeing the full circle of existence and discovering that to be filled one must first become empty. It can only be said that when you are full you cast away your oneness (this is where you give, this is where you abandon reason and this is where the illusion begins). Illusion is finite but Truth is infinite, therefore illusion must give way as you awaken once again to the joy and peace of your unchanged infinite perfect state of being. (This is where you receive, this is where you find your reason, and this is where the illusion ends).


I think that one way of answering this question is by asking yourself another question. If breathing in is good, then why would you ever choose to breath out. The answer as I see it is that after breathing in you have been filled with the sustenance and strength that you need which puts you in a position where you are now capable of breathing out again. God has no fear of letting go of the comforts of bliss, for from the viewpoint of his omnipotent perspective he can see that the rewards of their return are great. Its part of God’s plan to give and receive unending fulfillment, but to receive fulfillment you must first be empty.


I think that the best way to look at this is the old tried and true "do unto others as you would have them do unto you"......because they are you. It's all about finding a way to come into harmony with yourself. This is not an exact science, but instead takes intuition.


The term *matters* suggests that you are having an effect on something; that you are causing something to change. In reality, the truth that you are infinite and perfect never changes.


The following is from a discussion with a friend of mine. We were discussing the meaning of life and he asserted that three statements should be the basis around which we would begin our discussion. The statements were that we did not choose to be born, we do not choose to die and that we do not choose to have free will. Below is my response in which I tried to show a possible scenario in which we do choose to live and die or in other words, engage in the illusion of a finite existence.

The first two statements say that we did not choose to live or die. I think that it is possible that we did choose to live and die, although the choice may have been inevitable, in which case it becomes very difficult, if not impossible, to say whether or not this is truly a free choice. The third statement says that we did not choose to have free will. I think that this may be true. It may be our true nature to have free will, but this absolute true nature of our being also appears to be showing us that it has its limitations as well because as we can see, it does not afford us the choice to not have free will as you have pointed out. This is where the necessity for illusion comes in. It completes us; it is the other half that makes us whole. It allows all things to be possible and all greatness to be great.

I was thinking about this last night and some words were going round and round in my head; words like potential, sine wave, opposites, positive and negative (like electricity), truth, lie, real, illusion, light, dark, mysteries revealed, mysteries hidden, one, many….I was thinking of that Bill Hicks guy too (the comedian that I sent you the links of). I was thinking about what he was saying about life being just a ride. I was imagining what it would be like to get off of that ride and be so astounded, so amazed, so excited. I was picturing all of the mysteries being revealed, the truth of reality being shown, all of the pain and suffering and uncertainty being removed and finding myself whole and complete and safe and realizing that I really had been in this state the whole time, that it all really had been just a dream, but a fantastic one at that! I imagined myself on my knees in front of some kind of archaic looking stone symbol that I had just uncovered in the sand (this represented the truth that I had just uncovered). There was darkness all around and I was looking up at a warm comforting light shining from above. This place that I could imagine arriving to after having gotten off of the ride was like a safe haven, home base you might call it. It is a very solitary calm and safe place. I knew that I could stay here as long as I liked, and I did stay for a while, just basking in the afterglow and looking around thinking god this is just incredible. I was thinking to myself “so this is it huh?” I can stay here as long as I like or I can go back on the ride again any time I want and I will always end up back here because this is the truth, which lasts forever, and the ride is just an illusion which must come to an end. As this revelation washed over me and excitement began to well up in my chest and a smile grew on my face, which soon became laughter of joy as I quickly began burying the symbol in the sand again…….and in the twinkling of an eye I was off on my next adventure.


I was watching a show on the History Channel one time about Alcatraz. In the show an old man was recounting his incarceration there years ago. He told of a time that he was put into solitary confinement in complete darkness for several weeks if I recall correctly. He developed a game to amuse himself and to maintain he sanity. He took a small object, I'm thinking it was a button off of his shirt, and he would cover his ears and throw it into the darkness. He would then proceed to attempt to find it again. He did this over and over and over. This gave me an idea for an analogy to life. I wondered if maybe God did this in a way by covering the Truth with a lifetime that must surely end, ensuring the sweet rewards of the Truth being revealed yet again.

The illusion which is our lives is essentially a way of getting something from nothing, or wringing fresh sweet water from a stone. God is both, something and nothing, everything and nothing. God is nothing in the sense that it does not exist to anything outside of itself, but to itself it's everything. God creates by temporarily covering the truth.


There is only one being that is real and infinite and perfect. We are that being, temporarily seeing itself as an infinite number of imperfect, finite beings and things. We are in a cyclical process in which we perceive something that is not true (this is the state we are in now where we see our self as separate beings and things) and then we return to reality and there is just YOU, that one infinite perfect being. It is that part of you that was the only thing that was real to begin with. It is that part of you that transcends a name and matter and death. What are we doing in this imperfect state right now?....we are defining and reaffirming our true nature which is infinite and perfect. There is only infinite, there is no finite. It’s like looking at a one and a zero and insisting that there really is in fact a zero there next to the one. In a sense there is a zero there, but it just represents nothing. All it really does is define the one. All things that are imperfect and finite are just a big ZERO. They are not real now, nor were they ever real. That part in you that says "I know I am real" is in fact right, but that part in you that says that you are imperfect and finite is just that big zero which defines your true nature. I realized something a while back when I was trying to think of a way in which this could be explained to someone else. The realization that I came to is that you don't walk up to someone and say "hey man, I figured something out, I'm god", instead, I think that a good way of explaining it is to say to that person "you are god" because it's true and this is something that every single person can say to themselves and it still holds true. You are the One.


This is something else that I decided to throw in. It is a story that I thought up one day not too long ago. I was thinking about how there may be something to learn from different sources that we may dismiss at first. It might be a religion or philosophy or a person, or tv show. The source could really be anything.

Once upon a time there was a young man seeking enlightenment. After much searching he finally found a wise old teacher who agreed to take him on as a student and show him the way to enlightenment. All that the teacher asked for in return for each lesson was one penny. Each day the young man would visit his teacher’s house, give him the penny for his thoughts and receive his lesson. One day the student was on the way to his teacher’s house when he saw a wretched old man sitting on the side of the road. The old man had a beggar’s cup in front of him and he was babbling incoherently, but as the young man was about to pass him by, the old beggar said something very profound and meaningful. This gave pause to the young man and he was intrigued so he stopped to listen, but as soon as he stopped in front of the old man, the old man began to babble complete nonsense again. The young student took pity on the beggar and remembering that his teacher had taught him to always be kind to others; he decided to give the old man the one penny that he had with him which was supposed to be for the lesson at his teacher’s house that day. Then he went on his way again shaking his head and feeling very foolish for having stopped to listen to such a crazy old fool.

When the young man got to his teachers house he explained to his teacher that he did not have the penny for his lesson. He told his teacher that he hoped he would understand, since the only reason he did not have the penny was because he had done what he had been taught and had been kind to the beggar on the side of the road. The teacher just chuckled and comforted his student saying - don’t worry, I was the old man on the side of the road. I gave you your lesson there today. The student was astounded and said teacher, you must be a great man indeed; you must have done this by some work of magic. Again the teacher just chuckled and said no, it was no work of magic. I have simply lived at this house for a very long time and I have learned a shortcut home. I took the shortcut and got back here before you did. Now, do you remember what I taught you today on the side of the road? The student began to search his mind frantically, trying to remember what the old man had said. After several minutes of uncomfortable silence he said, no, I am sorry teacher; I thought you were just a poor beggar and that you were crazy. I remember that you said something that seemed to make sense, but when I heard you talking nonsense again, I dismissed what you said and now I cant remember. With this the teacher became very angry with the student and said; you have disappointed me today. You thought me a fool and you threw out my good teaching. If you are hungry and searching for food and you come by a tree bearing fruit, do you not stop and eat? The student sheepishly shakes his head yes. If you come closer to this tree and find that on one branch it is bearing bad fruit, rotten with worms and on the other branch it is bearing good fruit, do you not still take the good fruit from the one branch and go away happy and full? Again the embarrassed student shakes his head yes. Well this is not what you have done today. You have squandered my teaching and you have lost your lesson for today. Now go home and think about this and if I am able to find my patience with you I will teach you again tomorrow. The student turns to go out the door, deeply disappointed in himself for having not been wiser. Just then something dawns on him and he stops and turns before going out the door. The student and the teacher look at each other and a sly smile begins to form on the teachers face. The student smiles too, and soon they are both laughing until they can’t catch their breath. It turns out the student got his lesson that day after all.


You are God. This may seem very egotistical, but actually it becomes clear that it’s just the opposite as you come to understand the next statement.

You are alone. This does not mean that you loose your family, friends and loved ones that gave you so much comfort throughout your life; it just means that they were never separate from you to begin with. They are within you.

Your mind creates the world around you.

When you die you do not dissolve back into the world around you but instead the world dissolves back into your mind.

When you come into this world you have departed from reality into a world of illusion. You have departed from the real and eternal into the unreal and temporary. This is a paradox because you never really left in the first place. There is no reason for this journey because by its very nature something that is untrue is also unreasonable and so it is that there can be no answer to the question why. It is simply natural that you are not perfect in this world and that you grow old and die. These are the characteristics of that which is not true.

Your higher self (God) is no more concerned about this process than you are concerned about falling asleep at night or expelling a breath. In fact, this process is the breath of life itself and eternal awakening.

With love,


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